On a perfect sunny day, life seems to be perfect
Life is a race to the end and it is run in stages. Some are easy stages, we later recognise as happy times, and some are torturous stages, the hill sections, when we learn about ourselves and others.
We know actually right from the start that the finishing line is waiting for us. But it is rather nebulous and as long as the sun shines we could not care less. The finishing line is so far out that it doesn’t matter where it is. We are happy to complete the stages. Even the numbers of stages are unknown to us.
Some of us come around a bend in our lives and before we know it, the finishing line is there right in front of us and we have no time to contemplate our fate. It is all over. It happened to me one cold winter day when I fell off my pushbike and lost consciousness. I might just as well have been dead.
I belong to the ones who went through many stages. We believe, despite knowing otherwise, nothing will happen to us and the universe will make an exception for us. “Pustekuchen”, we say in German when our expectations aren’t being met. All our assumptions are then blown away. The assumptions were just hot air.
A couple of weeks ago, I went to see my friendly family doctor with a minor complaint. After a few tests, he looked at me sternly and told me straight to my face:”You have a tumour.” When he saw my stunned face he added: ” You know, a tumour!?!”
Oh, I heard him loud and clear. What he was saying to me, was that he had discovered something in my body that marked my point of destination – my finishing line had come into view. It is not clear whether I’m on my last stage or the second last one. It depends on so many variables. If I pace myself properly, I might be able to add another stage to my life. If not, the next bend could bring the end.
Of course, my adult children are in denial and tell me, I’ll be one hundred one day. The stage I’m now in, there is still a flat section before the final climb, and I am still enjoying the race. The sun is still shining.
A Black Swan is sorting out the eggs it is sitting on.
I have been a marathon runner and ran many road races over several distances and I have learnt to cope with pain. I don’t now how the pain will be in the end, but I hope for the best. So far, I am still pain-free (which makes my situation surreal) but I do expect the medical profession to add to my discomfort. It is all part of the cards I have been dealt for the final stage (or stages).
I will still be blogging, and from time to time I will report on what is happening to me.
The motto of my blog is:
“It is about life, as I experienced it, how I see it and how I imagine it…”
Is this an exit or an entrance to something new, as the mountain beckons in the distance to be climbed?
Berlioz1935's Blog 